A helpul reframe

What if this were the last time?

I experience a lot of anxiety daily, a side effect of my IBS.

Social situations are the worst. They dial my anxiety knob up to 11. This makes it hard to want to commit to doing things ahead of time. I never know how I'll feel the day of the event, and I hate canceling after committing to something. Also, the level of prep required to get my mind and body ready to be outside can be exhausting.

For all these reasons, I often prefer to stay in the comfort of my home. Like I almost did last night.

Last night was my dad's birthday. The celebration was set at a restaurant nearby. Restaurants are hard when you have IBS. I could feel the feedback loop between my brain and my stomach starting to work against me. Almost as if they were playing ping-pong with my anxious thoughts, back and forth between the two.

Then I asked myself one question that helped me put everything into perspective almost immediately: What if this is the last birthday you and your dad get to spend together?

The shift in viewpoint away from my woes to savoring the moment worked. My anxious thoughts settled, and we had an amazing dinner together. Now we have a new shared memory we can appreciate.

A lot of us go through things. A lot of deeply personal things. We must take care of ourselves, yes, but also remember not to let those things ultimately rob us of the joy available in our daily lives if we can. We only get one shot at life, and it's wildly unpredictable. Appreciate what you have now.

What if this were the last time you get to do this?